Transcript:Katnappe!
Jack: I thought we had a good thing going here Wuya. You sense the Shen Gong Wu, I pick them up with solid hands. Katnappe: Uh, hello? I've got hands. Two of them. Jack: Stay out of this Ashley. Katnappe: My evil name's Katnappe, doofus. Jack: Who you calling' doofus, Kitty Litter? Katnappe: Who you calling' Kitty Litter, Robo-freak? Wuya: Enough! Cease your bickering. Jack: Point is, we don't need her to rule the world. We're doing fine. Wuya: Fine you say? Then where is the Eye of Dashi? Jack: Well, I uh- Wuya: Where is the Two-Ton Tunic? Jack: Funny you should ask, maybe- Wuya: Where are the Golden Tiger Claws? Jack: Okay, so I've had some bad luck. Katnappe: Face it, you need Katnappe. PURRS Omi: Please hurry, Kimiko. I cannot wait to see the Tiger Claws in action. Kimiko: Cool your jets, Omi. Raimundo: Let me get this straight. These claws can transport you anywhere in the world, right? Clay: That's the story. Kimiko: Golden Tiger Claws! Woah! What a veiw. The temple. This so rocks! ECHOS Now, back to the temple. Omi: How was it? Where did you go? What was it like? Did you bring me a present? Kimiko: In order. Tight. On top. A little breezy, and sorry, no. You're up, Clay. Clay: Any words of wisdom before I give 'em a whirl? Kimiko: Just decide where you want to go, and the claws take you there. And keep your hands inside the tunnel at all times. Clay: Golden Tiger Claws! Omi: Oh! Where do you think he is going? Raimundo: Some place with an all-you-can-eat buffet. Clay: Woo-ee! No place like Billy Bob's Texas Style All-You-Can-Eat Buffet. Omi: My turn! My turn! Raimundo: Ha Ha! Too slow. Tiger Claws! Omi: Hey! Not fair! Raimundo: Want these? Omi: Hiya! Raimundo: Oops. Here you go. Omi: Hiya! Raimundo: Look, in front of Omi. Behind Omi. To the left of- whoa! Clay: Hold your horses, pardner. Kimiko: It's Omi's turn. Clay: Give the little fella a chance. Omi: While I appreciate your help, I must point out that I am not little. I am small-boned. Clay: Oh. My mistake, little um, pardner. Omi: At last. The Golden Tiger Claws are mine to wield. Golden Tiger Cla- Dojo: Stop everything! We got a hot one. Master Fung: A new Shen Gong Wu has revealed itself. Omi: Ugh. Talk about rotted timing. Kimiko: Rotten timing. Omi: That too. Raimundo: What's up with the glowing X? Kimiko: They're chopsticks. Master Fung: The Changing Chopsticks are wondrous Shen Gong Wu. They can shrink you down to the size of a grain of rice. Raimundo: Oooh. Real scary. Dojo: Hey, the bigger they are, the harder they fall. So, the smaller they are, uh- Raimundo: The lighter they fall? Dojo: Yeah, that's it. Yeah, right. Omi: If we are lucky, maybe I will use the Golden Tiger Claws in a Xiaolin Showdown. Let us remove the lead. Kimiko: Let the lead out. Omi: That too. [ ] Jack: Okay, Katnappe, you want to find the Changing Chopsticks, huh? Well check this. Personal robotized army. All part of the Jack Spicer evil package. Katnappe: I didn't bring robots, just my kittens. MEOWING Jack: LAUGHS Kittens? What could they- HISSING Jack: SCREAMS Katnappe: Oh, did I mention they're genetically altered super kittens? Jack: Uh, no. That didn't come up. Wuya: Delicious, Katnappe. Simply delicious. Now, find me the Changing Chopsticks. Katnappe: I'm so on it. Meow. MEOWING Omi: Who is that? Kimiko: And what's with the tacky costume? Raimundo: Yo, girl. Seen a mirror lately? Katnappe: Hey, these your sticks? Wuya: Well done, Katnappe. It's good to know I can count on someone. Jack: WHIMPERS Katnappe: It's not like it's brain surgery. Wuya: GASPS Omi! Katnappe: HISSES Omi: Yes, Wuya. You and your minions shall not escape with this Shen Gong Wu. I challenge you, uh, name please? Katnappe: Katnappe. Omi: Katnappe, I challenge you to a Xiaolin Showdown. Katnappe: Okay. Jack: Ha! Katnappe can't do a showdown, she's Shen Gong Wu-less. If that's a word. Wuay: Which is why you will give her yours. Jack: So not. Wuya: Hand over the fist of Tebigong. Jack: Only because I think this will teach you a lesson. Better not lose it. Katnappe: Doofus. Jack: What's the challenge, Omi? Omi: A game of tag. Katnappe: Tag? Me-ow. Omi: Let's go! Xiaolin Showdown! I must warn you, with my Tiger Claws, I can disappear, and then reappear in the blink of an eye. Your fist of Tebigong will be of no use. I shall win very fast. Katnappe: Bleh bleh-bleh bleh-bleh How do we start this thing? Jack: She doesn't even know how to Showdown. Wuya: Hush, boy. Omi: We start like this. Gong yi tan psi! Katnappe: Fist of Tebigong. Omi: Ah! Katnappe: Tiger Claws! Tag. You lose. Ha! look at me, I won. Very fast. Ha! PURRS Dojo: What happened? I blinked and missed it. Wuya: Well done, Katnappe. Well done! Jack: Well done, Katanppe. Well done! Wuya: My dear girl, there is much evil for me to teach you. Jack: But- But I'm your evil favorite! Wuya: Not anymore. In fact, with Katnappe by my side, I don't need you and your mindless robotic contraptions. Jack: Hey, hey don't insult them. They've got emotion chips. Wuya: Come with me, Katnappe. Together we will rule the world. Katnappe: Uh, nice offer and all, but I don't want to rule the world. Wuya: What? Katnappe: Well, not with you, at least. I mean, bossy much? And Jack? Ick! Whiny little weirdo. Jack: I am not! Katnappe: Whatever, I'm out. But, I will keep these, they accessorize really well. Golden Tiger Claws! Wuya: No! Jack: Well, who's your evil favorite now? Do I hear Jack Spicer? [ ] Omi: I have failed. Failure is the road I now walk. Kimiko: Don't beat yourself up, Omi. Sure it would've been nice to get those chopsticks, but- Omi: Chopsticks? Oh, oh yes, the Changing Chopsticks. I am upset because I lost them. My sorrow has nothing to do with the much more impressive Golden Tiger Claws. Raimundo: Good cover. We completely bought it. Kimiko: The point is, you lost. It happens. Just move on. Master Fung: On the contrary, Kimiko. There are no lessons in victory, but a thousand in defeat. Omi: How can that be true master? Clay: Don't make no sense to me. Master Fund: Allow me to illustrate. I challenge you to steal this elephant from me. If you succeed, no chores for one week. Clay: Ooo sounds good. Omi: Oh, yes. Raimundo: Oh yeah, I'm cool with that. Kimiko: LAUGHS gosh. Master Fung: But, if you lose, you must hand scrub the floors of the grand hall. Monks: SIGH Clay: Those are some mighty steep stakes, Master Fung. Kimiko: We can do it. Raimundo: No doubt. Omi: We accept your challenge. [ ] Omi: Ha. Master Fung: Too obvious. Kimiko: Hiya! Master Fung: Perhaps you do not wish to win. Raimundo: YELLS Clay: Gotcha' C'mon little doggie. Well that's plum disappointin' Raimundo: Hey, you broke it. Can he do that? Omi: Master, how could we win such a contest? Master Fung: You couldn't. Kimiko: What? Master Fung: Your goal, my young monks, was to win, while mine was simply not to lose. That is victory enough for me. Raimundo: Okay, that's one lesson. Where are the other 999? Master Fung: Perhaps you'll learn those as you scrub the grand hall floors. Don't forget to get between the tiles. [ ] Raimundo: LAUGHING Omi: We are supposed to hand scrub the floors, Raimundo. Raimundo: You're being too literal. Besides, this is more fun. Kimiko: Hey. Clay: Don't think skatin' is one of the thousand lessons we're supposed to be learnin' Omi: Perhaps one lesson is proper scrubbing technique. I find a circular motion works best. You missed a spot. Kimiko: Thanks. GASPS What's that? Sorry, it was just the wind. Hmm. You missed a spot too, Omi. Omi: Oh my. Thank you, Kimiko. I have learned a lesson in diligence. Only 998 to go. Clay: Oh. I feel like I just got off a bull. Or a bull just got off me. Raimundo: Ah. Oh. Ow. Kimiko: It even hurts to web surf. Omi: All the soreness is rushing to my head. Ow. Kimiko: Hey guys, look at this. Clay: Sure hope this is worth the walk. Kimiko: It is There are a dozen stories on the web about a girl in a cat costume robbing stores then disappearing. Clay: Katnappe! Raimundo: Wow. What deductive skills. Omi: We must stop her. Right after I stop the wobbling of my legs. Computer: You've got a news alert. Kimiko: She's at the Mall of the World. Omi: Dojo! Dojo: You want me to take you to the Mall of the Wold? This official Xiaolin business or we just gonna hang out at the food court? Omi: It is most official, Dojo. Kimiko: Katnappe is using the Golen Tiger Claws to commit crimes. Dojo: What? Hop on. We've got cat to declaw. Katnappe: Huh. Not a bad haul. Omi: Katnappe! Katnappe: MEOWS Omi: You are misusing the powers of a Shen Gong Wu. You must surrender! Katnappe: You'll have to catch me first. Omi: Water! Hiya! Katnappe: Tiger Claws! Dojo: Omi! Hang on, kid. Kittens: MEOWING Dojo: Say, are you genetically altered super kittens? Hey, hey now. This is why I'm not a cat person. Kimiko: Fire! Raimundo: Wind Katnappe: Too slow. Raimundo: YELLS Clay: Hold on there, Katnappe! Katnappe: Are you gonna fight, cowboy, or just stand there? Clay: I'm sorry mam, but do you have some male kin-folk I could fight instead? Raimundo: C'mon Clay! Get her. Clay: Sorry, guys. Can't do it. I can't fight a girl. Katnappe: Then this'll be quick. Raimundo: Clay, man, haven't you heard? Chivalry is dead. Katnappe: See ya Xiaolin Warriors. I got more shopping to do. Meow. Dojo: Except for the parts where she slapped us silly and got away, I think that went pretty well. All: SIGH Dojo: Guys, any inspirations yet? Omi: Not yet. Dojo: Fine, I'll just be flying in circles. Don't mind me. Omi: We need a plan to stop Katnappe. Raimundo: Let's start with a plan to find Katnappe. She could be anywhere. Clay: You know, back home we have a saying. Wanna catch a rooster, go where it crows. Kimiko: She's already been everywhere I'd go. Toy stores, music shops, candy stores. Raimundo: Ah, but that's you. Where would a cat fanatic go? Clay: I'm guessin' the dog park is out. Kimiko: Got it. Catatonia Land. Omi: Cat-a-what-a-who Land? Kimiko: The best amusement park in the world. The scariest roller coasters, the fastest rides, and the best cotton candy anywhere. Clay: And everythin's shaped like cats. Raimundo: Just as long as it doesn't smell like cats. Ugh. Kimiko: That's where she is. I guarantee it. Omi: Hurry, Dojo. To Catatonia Land. Dojo: Malls, theme parks, sure you're not just playing hooky? Katnappe: Hmmm. Swipe. Kid: Hey! That's mine! CRYS Katnappe: My turn. Kids: YELLING HISSING Kimiko: Oh, maybe I was wrong. I don't see any sign of Katnappe. Omi: Only because you are looking in the wrong places. Katnappe: Me-ow-ow-ow! Raimundo: The nine lives coaster. Clay: Whoo-ee. Dojo: Can I sit this one out. Roller coasters make me nauseate. Kimiko: We'll be ready for her when she gets off. Omi: Really? How can we win when she has already defeated us twice? Clay: She packs one heck of a wallop. Kimiko: Even without the tiger claws. Omi: There are no lessons in winning, but a thousand lessons in defeat. Raimundo: All I've learned is Clay won't fight a girl. Omi: GASPS I am struck by inspiration! Katnappe: LAUGHING MEOWS Back for more? Sweet. I like kicking your butts. Omi: It is not our butts that shall be kicked. Clay. Clay: Howdy, mam. Katnappe: All right. You're gonna fight me? Clay: Nope. I cannot, will not, and should not ever fight a girl. But technically, a bear hug ain't fightin'. Katnappe: Hey! Let go of me! Clay: No can do, mam. Katnappe: Fine. Kitties, attack! HISSING Omi: Ha ha! Victory! Jack: There she is! Told you my blood hound bots could track down Katnappe. BARKING Jack: Now hand over the Tiger Claws. Omi: But- But I just got them. Jack: Yeah, that's a real tear jerker. Omi: Tiger Claws! Wuya: No! Jack: What did you just do? Omi: I sent the Golden Tiger Claws to the Earth's core. Clay: Been nice, not fightin' with ya, mam. Katnappe: Why did you do that? You're so stupid. Omi: Perhaps I will never get to use the Golden Tiger Claws, but neither will you. Katnappe: HISSES Jack: Get in, Ashley. Kimiko: And that's victory enough for us. You okay, Omi? You really wanted to use those Tiger Claws. Omi: One does not always get what one wants, Kimiko. Clay: Guess that's one of Master Fung's thousand lessons. Raimundo: These thousand lessons, I'm not gettin' them. Three, maybe four tops. Kimiko: So true. Master Fung: Not getting all the lessons are we? Then perhaps a refresher is required. I shall guard this jade monkey. If you can steal it from me- Raimundo: Pass. Kimiko: Ditto. Clay: Wait for me. Omi: I mean no disrespect, Master, but I am so out of here. Master Fung: LAUGHS I'd say they learned one more lesson. Dojo: Never bet against Fung. Master Fung: Up high. Dojo: Down low. Category:Transcripts